This Weird Thing Called Marriage

Two weeks and one day ago, I said my vows to my husband.  That's still weird to say.  Husband.  After so many years of wishing and waiting and waiting and more waiting, I can finally call Chris my husband.

Marriage suits me.  I know it doesn't suit everyone.  I know plenty of people who've been happy being single all their lives or at least at this point in their lives.  But marriage suits me very well.

I love having someone to come home to.  Someone to talk to while I fall asleep.  Someone to cook for.  Someone to help with the laundry.  Someone to play video games and card games with (and sometimes beat).  Someone to share my thoughts with that no one else could ever quite understand the way he does.  And he shares with me.

That's one of my favorite parts.  When we sit for hours just talking.  Sometimes about our life goals, sometimes about future children (give us a few years), sometimes about how badly our days went.

There's something about this guy that just makes sense for me to share my life with him.  We really are partners.  I know there will be rough times, I know we'll argue (we're both too stubborn with strong personalities), I know sometimes we'll wonder why we ever got married in the first place.  But the cool part is, I don't think we'll wonder for long.  We'll remember these first few weeks when using titles like husband and wife and falling asleep in each other's arms was not just new but correct.  It's the way life should be.

I know I'm no expert on marriage.  One cannot truly become an expert on anything in two weeks.  Yet I know the greatest thing that a married couple could ever know, ever remember, ever fall back on--love transcends.  Beyond the time of day, beyond the argument, beyond the headaches and hurtful words and impatience.

Now I need to do another load of unending laundry and hang a clock so we're not late for work in the mornings.

Continually Playing Catch Up

It's been almost 2 months since my last post!  Whoops!

Well, in the last 2 months...

I finished my first year of graduate school
Chosen my thesis and gotten it approved
Started 3 summer jobs (one of which is an internship)
Moved to our new apartment
Gotten my wedding dress refitted after losing 20 pounds!

Those are the biggies.

So in a week we will be halfway to my hometown.  In 2 weeks we will be back in Waco, all married.

I've been thinking a lot over the last few months about how I won't be known by my maiden name anymore.  I've always been known by my family (mostly my dad), partly because it's not a terribly common name.  Last I checked, there were only about 800 in the country with that spelling.

I know I'll love my new name.  It sounds nice.  And I'll love being identified with my (soon-to-be) husband.  (He did, however, say that he would let me do whatever I wanted with the name situation--take his, hyphenate, keep mine as is... I've chosen to take his.)

It's just a weird feeling.  After 25 1/2 years of being known a certain way, that's going to change.  Just like it was weird when I started my student teaching over 3 years ago and became known as Ms. Minott instead of Sarah.  I've gotten used to it, and I even like it a lot.  Now I'll be known by another name.  I hope I quickly learn to answer to it!

So, beyond the thinking about names....

We booked our honeymoon to Scotland!  Yes, be jealous, but not necessarily as much as you might be.  We're going also for my thesis research and for Chris to visit a university he's thinking about attending for his PhD.

Either way, though, I'm stoked.  It'll definitely be an adventure!

I'm sure there are other things going on, but with all the wedding tasks I need to do and 3 jobs and being tired, I can't think of any more.

Peace be with you, and we'll see if I can try not to wait another 2 months for a new post.

Sometimes Plateaus Are Bumpy, Too

So the weight loss is slowing now. I've been stuck at 215 for a while. Plateau, it is then.

I'm mostly okay with it, though. I mean, I'm not stopping, but I'm not depressed over it.

Other things have been rough.

A couple weeks ago I was in San Antonio for my first museum conference. I'd been to 4 education conferences ranging from about 50 participants to 1,000. This was a bit on the smaller side with (I think) a couple hundred, but there were still a lot of people, I think. We saw many of the best museums in San Antonio, including the Witte, the McNay, the Alamo, and others.

It was our last night, the evening event at the Witte, when the roughness hit. Earlier that day, my mom told me that my aunt had had a stroke while at work. At that time, she was stable and awake. Then in the midst of enjoying the varied exhibits at the Witte, I discovered a missed call from my mom. My aunt was no longer quite stable and no longer awake. That was Thursday night. But Saturday night, she was gone.

I wasn't particularly close to this aunt, but I worried over my grandma. This was her second child to pass in less than two years. I felt it was very unfair to her. And my aunt was a couple months younger than my mom. That's a scary thought, too.

I was told not to come home by both my grandma and my dad. Part of me was relieved to not have the 14 hour drive each way, but the other part of me wonders how I will get closure. (I wasn't able to go home when my uncle died either.)

So that was rough. And I don't really know how to talk about it. I cried with my friends who were there at the museum with me. I cried while talking with Chris within minutes of talking to my mom. Then I was done. I haven't cried over it since. And I've only told one other person that it even happened. It's weird that Facebook explodes with prayer requests constantly, yet I have not said a word about it. I don't know how. Not really. Even a simple, "Pray for my family, my aunt passed away," seemed inadequate and desperate. So I didn't say anything.

Now, I am. And I suppose it's okay now that it's been a while.

It feels almost like it did when my childhood best friend what hit by that train a few years ago and died within days afterwards. The event is so removed from me geographically, and on some level emotionally, that I'm not quite sure how, or even if I need to, grieve.

I didn't mean to spend all that time on the one family sadness here. I was meaning to do more of a quick list, but that didn't happen.

But now it's time for a fresh cup of coffee so I can do all those little projects while Chris does his homework. Lots of books for my classes, things to do for the wedding, and a bit of reading and planning for my thesis.

I will be productive. I will be productive. I will be productive.

And maybe this plateau will decide to give way up or down.

Continuing Journey

Almost 2 months ago I was instructed to lose at least 10% of my body weight. That day I started Weight Watchers.

Now I am almost 20 lbs lighter! Still have a few more to reach the 10% goal, but my goal is to be under 200 by my wedding day (3 months minus 1 day!) I have about 16 more lbs to reach that goal. I also want my collar bones to make an appearance again (my favorite part of wearing prom dresses in high school), and they are surfacing a little!

February 7, 2012

March 24, 2012

If you look closely, you can see a bit of shadow from my collar bone!

When I started this, my collar bones were smoothly hidden under fat.

I've noticed an increase in energy (not quite a lot, but still noticeable), better sleep without sleep aids (which I'd taken for over 5 years), and less of a craving for icky foods. In fact, I care much more to know what is in the foods I eat, so I've been making more from scratch.

My tops are fitting a bit better, and my pants are too big! It's still frustrating right now that I don't seem to have actually dropped a pant size, but the pants I have stretch out in an hour of wearing them and are too big to sit where they're supposed to sit!

Chris says he can tell I'm losing weight, and the scale backs that up with numbers, so I'll keep at it. Even after the wedding, I plan to keep with the WW lifestyle until I reach a much healthier weight (like 150 lbs). That means I could lose about 80 lbs before I feel like I can back off a little (just not back off enough to put the weight back on).

I know I won't be able to be "skinny" because of my hereditary big bones, but I can certainly be more healthy in my size and weight.

And I'm on my way there!

Cooking Adventures and RSVPs

Spring Break was a week ago... This past week went by 10x faster than break did. That's great! I mean, we drove all over the place (Waco to OKC to KC to Decatur to KC to Bolivar to Waco) and saw LOTS of people for Jess's wedding and our wedding shower and other celebrations. We found a lovely spice shop at the City Market, went to a couple museums, and I had my first REAL KC bbq!

Chris and I having BBQ at Jack Stack Barbecue

WWI Memorial and Museum

Now we're back, I have a crock pot, mixing bowls, can opener, and a toaster! (Many other things, but we haven't unpacked everything yet. Some will wait for our new place in 2 months.)

So what have I been doing this week? Practicing with my new cooking gadgets! First I made bbq chicken in the crock pot (the sauce was delicious), then chicken parmesan in the crock pot, now I'm making a big batch of chicken noodle soup to portion out and freeze. For tonight I made homemade salsa to add to our tacos. Might be a bit spicy, but we'll manage.

Homemade Salsa

(a little too much for my food processor, but it's okay!)

Chicken Noodle Soup

So busy! (On top of class and work and wedding stuff.)

Speaking of wedding stuff, we've been getting lots of RSVPs! It's good to know who to expect to be there. We've been getting 2 to 4 cards per day nearly every day since we got back from break. (We had 23 cards in my mailbox when we got back. I felt a little bad for the mail carrier who had to stuff magazines and cards in the box for a week!)

RSVP cards!

Side note: I may have just rubbed a bit of pepper juice into my eye. Not sure, but it hurts! And, yes, I've washed my hands several times since handling the jalepeno.

Presentation, Please? Then Packing.

This semester has been full of presentations, it seems. I don't mind all that much. Although I am starting to have interesting fun with PowerPoint in order to keep myself and my classmates entertained. I just finished making one for online exhibits that I will do tomorrow. Lots of flying pictures. :)

So I've had 4 full weeks now on WW, and I'm down about 15 pounds! It's starting (I think) to become more noticeable. I might have to get my wedding dress fitted again (what a horrible thing... not!). It's worth a little extra expense, I know.

Also a week from today will be my maid of honor's first full day of being my matron of honor! She's getting married this Saturday, and I can't wait to see her get hitched! She'll be crazy beautiful, I know, as she always is.

Last night Chris and I finished addressing, sealing, and stamping our wedding invitations. It's such a relief! Now for all those other projects that need done....

And spring break is coming up starting this weekend. Traveling to Missouri for Jess's wedding, then over to Illinois for our wedding shower with my side. It'll be a long, but valuable week away from classes and with family and friends. Just need to pack before Thursday.

That's all for now, I suppose.

Peace.

Reality, a New Stage, and a New Start... For Realz

I'm still waiting for the silver ink to dry on the program covers I made for the wedding. They've been drying since last night, and I'm trying to fi
gure out if it's really wet or the silver stuff just smudges anyway. The sample I did a few weeks ago doesn't smudge anymore. Hm.

Today has been a long day. I'm actually about to get ready for bed, I'm so tired. I took my nightly meds half an hour ago. At 8:00. I'm opting to go into work early tomorrow so I can go to bed now.

I had a doctor appointment this morning. I got there 15 minutes before my scheduled appointment and didn't even have time to finish the top of the form before the nurse called me back to start getting vitals. (By the way, I was very sad to see my weight. It's gone up about 50 lbs in the last 3 years.)

So, as a result of some somewhat minor health issues, I have been instructed to lose weight. What does this mean? Weight Watchers! Good news is that I have a smartphone, otherwise I don't think I'd last long. I can track my eating on the go! Plus I found out that even my favorite fruits cost me no points, so as long as I keep within the suggested daily servings, they can really supplement my meals so I'm not as hungry while I get used to smaller portions of less fatty foods.

The crazy thing is that I feel today has been a real turning point in my perspective on this stage of my life. I'm really working on my weight issues, I've got wedding things surrounding me, and I know a healthier me is getting ready to emerge.

So, here I am.

Day 1 - Feb 7, 2012

233 lbs

Size 18